OnTheBeach – Your True State of Being

- A note from Donna -

Oh, I was so enjoying that weather, I went out and bought a WICKED sun lounger (white and floral – it’s so cheery!) and it’s rained ever since. Aaaah, c’est la vie! But you know, whatever the weather is doing – get out and enjoy the outdoors. I was walking the dog today and everything looks so GREEN and gorgeous – because of the rain. Don’t let the rain get you down – get your wellies on, jump in some puddles and enjoy the green lusciousness of the country. (if you don’t live in England and you have decent weather – just enjoy that!)

- Your True State of Being -

So I was wondering what to write this week, and I was reminded of a message I get a lot (from my intuition, soul self, upstairs, whatever…from somewhere!) – be who you truly are. Do you know who you truly are? Not just your true personality, your true state of being. Most of us touch our true state of being occasionally – big occasions like weddings, births, and incredible experiences bring us close to that purity of feeling.

Sadly, most of the time our true state of being is hidden under a lifetime of worries, irrelevancies and distractions. So what is our true state of being? Love. Peace. Joy. Freedom. Bliss. Notice how you feel when you just say these words. Does one resonate with you more than others? For me, it’s joy. The very word tugs at my heart strings, and I KNOW that joy is my birthright.

As is love, peace, freedom and bliss. That is our true nature, our inner being, our soul is pure love, peace, joy, freedom and bliss. Easy to forget when the kids are screaming, the mortgage needs paying and you are stressed to the heavens. But we humans are pure love…just with lots of layers on! Take those layers off often and get in touch with who you truly are – you are an incredible, gifted, wonderful, gorgeous being with an immense capacity for love, joy, freedom, peace and bliss.

- Something To Play With -

I kept the article short this week so you’d have time for this quick meditation – breathe deeply, and as you breathe in imagine you are breathing in love from all around you (from spirit/God if that appeals to you). As you breathe out, imagine you are sending love out to all around you (or Spirit/God). Do this until you feel your heart expand with love…and if you can, keep going for a few more breaths and revel in this love!! Repeat often – you can even do this while staring at your computer screen…and no one will ever know!

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OnTheBeach – Savour Your Life

A note from Donna -

Oh Sunshiiiiiiiiine! In the UK we have such lovely weather at the moment – it is utterly delightful – blue skies, sunshine. Gorgeous. The papers have been full of stories about how much happier we are when the sun is shining. I have been loving it this week – and I have really been taking the time to appreciate it while it’s here. It’s been an immensely busy couple of weeks – workwise and socially – and it’s worth remembering that by being present, you amplify the joy in this moment. So if the sun is still shining, remember to take a moment to enjoy it!!

- Savour Your Life -

Isn’t it always the way that you have nothing to do for weeks, then all of a sudden everything comes at once. Like buses. My life has been like that these past 2 weeks – I’ve had lots of meetings, lots of social engagements, lots of stuff going on. I’ve barely had time to appreciate one thing before I’m moving on to the next one. Given the choice, I’d rather have a slightly less chaotic life, and more chance to savour each moment, but the beginning of May just hasn’t worked out that way!

It did get me thinking though – do you take the time to savour your life? The good stuff I mean, not the stuff that sucks!! When you are enjoying a meal with friends, are you fully there, enjoying said meal? Or are you worrying about the past or future, thinking about how much you have to do when you get home, too caught up in the enormity of life to appreciate the minutae of life?

Joy lives in the small things – in a starry sky at night, in beautiful sunshine, in the first spring flowers, in shared experience of friendship, in music, in dancing, in moments of appreciation for what is around you. And so often we go through life with our eyes half closed, not paying attention to what is there, not being present, not milking every ounce of enjoyment we can out of each precious moment.

This was underlined to me today as my friend followed me ‘the scenic route’ from where we met for lunch. It is a beautiful route – fields and trees and big skies, but because I drive it quite often, I had grown immune to the beauty! Today I looked at it through new eyes – eyes that have never seen it before…and it is a stunning journey. Not just a way to get from A to B, a journey to be savoured. Much like life. Are you savouring yours?

- Something To Play With –

As you go through life this week, remember to stop and savour the moment. Pause and smell the flowers, actually see the world around you as you drive or walk from place to place, enjoy doing what you are doing in this moment – savour these words! Want to share how this article affects you? Leave me a comment below

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OnTheBeach – When No Action is the Right Action

A note from Donna -

Well, finally I have completed “The Torturer’s Bible” – who knew that 30 pages would take 5 times as many days?! To those lovely people who are at the front of the queue, you will be receiving your link to download the ebook in the next couple of days. The rest of you will just have to wait til next week. If you can’t wait, drop me an e-mail with “I can’t wait that long, give me the link right now” in the subject.

- When No Action is the Right Action -

When was the last time you said to yourself “I really should have done that by now”? Maybe about your work, your fitness, your clutter clearing, your millionaire status? How often have you berated yourself for a task undone, a plan not put into action, a goal not yet achieved? Berating yourself is usually an attempt to motivate. Sadly, it doesn’t work too well. Mostly, it is demotivating and demoralising – you end up feeling like a failure for not having done whatever you thought you should be doing.

What if it was ok that you had taken no action? What if there was a reason for you to be inactive on this for a while? No, not that you are a lazy slob! A good reason. Maybe even one that you don’t know yet. Readers who’ve been with me for a while may remember an article last year about procrastination – in my view there are 2 reasons to procrastinate: not ready or don’t want to.

Don’t want to is easy, but not ready? How do you spot that one if you think you should be ready?! Let me give you an example. I’ve been writing an ebook for MONTHS…and I ‘should’ have finished it long ago! It’s the first in a long line of ebooks and audio programs…and this first step has taken (what seems to me to be) forever! But guess what? I wasn’t ready. It wasn’t ready.

Now I’d have sworn blind that I was ready all along…and I would have been totally wrong. This project is now finished, and I can see clearly that to have rushed it would have been a mistake. I can see now that those periods of seeming inaction were really ‘simmer-time’ – where the ideas, knowledge and vision were all coming together to make the next steps really obvious.

This happens absurdly often with clients too. They will be berating themselves for not having taken some action, then with hindsight they will realise that the delay factor was a good thing. I believe that we are always doing our best, and I also believe that this is a friendly universe. Put the two together, and maybe inaction is the best action to take?

- Something To Play With -

Think of a project you have been procrastinating on. If this delay was FOR you, and a good thing, why might that be? Want to share how this article affects you? E-mail me. I love to hear from readers, and will respond to all e-mails.

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OnTheBeach – Powerless

- A note from Donna -

Well, the day I’d set aside for putting the finishing touches to the Torturer’s Bible and setting up the webpage is a bit of a washout. We had a fuse burnout and the entire fuse box is being replaced as I speak! So, I am without Power. So you have another short wait before you can get your hands on this free ebook! If you are not already in the queue and would like to be among the first in the world to get a copy, e-mail me with “What’s that queue for? Must be something good, I’m going to join” in the subject line. Spookily enough, today’s subject fits well with this month’s recommended read – check it out.

- Powerless -

So I’m writing this article in the old-fashioned way – pen and paper – by daylight as I have no electricity. But for the sound of cars going by, I could be in another century. The house is incredibly still – not just quiet, but still. It’s rather nice actually! When I first discovered I would be without power for hours on end, I was lost! No computer, no radio, no light, no tv, no phone. I can’t even make the electrician a cuppa or myself a toastie.

So I took the dog for a nice walk. It was lovely – the sun was shining, and because I had no reason to rush back, it was very leisurely. Normally I am walking along thinking of what is going to happen when I return, but today there was going to be nothing happening without Power. I did think of several things I could do with the ‘powerless’ time, but there’s a curious feeling of ease and patience about it. There’s no rush to ‘do’ anything, no sense of time passing. There is just a curious serenity about the day.

In this world in this century, we are constantly being assaulted by technology. There is too much to do and too little time and we have very little ‘down-time’. Proper, quality down time, where there is no hurry to get anything done. Even on holiday, if we are so inclined, we can fill up every last moment with things to do. I feel quite sleepy, and yet also feel that I am being energised by this curiously calm space. Although I could break the silence with my MP3 player, I am happy enough to enjoy these hours of peace. After all, they are so rare; I may as well enjoy them!

- Something To Play With -

Notice today how much electricity adds to your busy life. Imagine just switching everything off for an hour or two, and only ‘doing’ what you feel like (that isn’t powered by the electricity board!). If that imagining feels good, switch off your computers, phones, tellies and radios and enjoy being powerless! Want to share how this article affects you? Leave me a comment below.

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OnTheBeach – Wake Up It’s a Beautiful Morning

- A note from Donna -

Tick, tock, tick, tock. The countdown is on for the launch of my free ebook “The Torturer’s Bible” – intrigued?? I am really excited about this project, and that’s why it’s taking so darn long to finish – I keep adding to it. What was a 15 page mini book is now nearly twice that. I am so lucky to have such wonderful enthusiasm for my work! Just a few more finishing touches, and it WILL be released! And you guys will be the first to know. Want a sneak peek before anyone else gets it? E-mail me with ‘I am in the queue with my sleeping bag and flask of hot coffee’ in the subject line, and you will be one of the first to get a copy.

- Wake up it’s a Beautiful Morning -

What do you wake up to? Do you wake up to the news telling you that it’s a depressing day in a depressing world? Do you wake up to some irritating idiot who thinks he’s funny? Do you wake up to a jarring beep-beep-beep-beep? Or do you wake up to something that fills you with joy, laughter, happiness, excitement for the day and energy? If you do the latter – congratulations!

What better way to start the day than being woken up by something joyful? Whether it’s children, cats, dogs, sunlight, music or the voice of a loved one it’s a wonderful thing to start the day feeling good. Now, I say this from the perspective of someone who has NEVER been a morning person! 7am is the middle of the night as far as I am concerned, and I have hated getting up ever since I was in school.

However, in recent years I’ve got better and better. I’m still a grouch in the morning – just don’t speak to me, and I’ll be fine – but I’ve found that much of my hatred of getting up is a matter of attitude…AND what I wake up to. I admit, it does help that I work a lot of the time from home, and I don’t have to get up at the crack of dawn, but even then, the insistent, jarring beep-beep-beep-beep would jolt me out of sleep with a racing heart and murder on my mind!

Some time ago I got a CD player alarm clock, so I could wake up to my choice of music every morning…much better! For weeks, I woke up to Antmusic by Adam and the Ants, and just recently I have been waking up to a CD by Abraham Hicks – very inspiring way to start the day! And then yesterday, I had an epiphany – create a CD of morning music. So here’s my playlist so far:

Lovely Day by Bill Withers (nice and mellow to begin with)
Feeling Good by Muse (more mellowness)
Beautiful Day by U2 (yep, time to wake up!)
Wake up Boo by the Boo Radleys
Pump It by Black Eyed Peas
What’s the story (morning Glory) by Oasis
Any ideas on what to add to this CD? (Just in case I am STILL lying in bed after half an hour of music…which is quite likely!) If you have some ideas, please e-mail me. You know, every morning you wake up alive, full of possibility and promise, IS a beautiful morning.

- Something To Play With -

What do you wake up to? Is it inspiring? Does it fill you with joy? If so, tomorrow morning, revel in that feeling of joy and wonder for 30 seconds before you get up. If not, what can you change today to make tomorrow morning a more beautiful morning? Want to share how this article affects you?

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OnTheBeach – Why Wait to Be Happy

- A note from Donna -

I got some bad news this week. A friend of the family died. I seem to have said that an awful lot in the last year. Death and his scythe seem to be very busy round here right now. This man turned 40 just a few short weeks ago and leaves 2 small children and his wife. Ugh. How many reminders can we take that life is short?? As you can imagine it’s left me feeling a bit flat this week, but when we went to see his wife and kids, me and the kids ended up outside on the trampoline at 9 at night – even at sad times, there’s fun to be had.

Lastly there will be a new recommended read next week, so if you’re interested in being a journalutionary, now’s the time!

- Why Wait to be Happy? -

What is in the way of you being happy right now? What are you waiting for? The right partner? The right house? Maybe the moon in Pisces? Everyone else to do what you think they should do? Is it the case that you can only be happy if everything is in alignment? Can you only enjoy life if all your ducks are in a row? Have you imposed conditions on your ability to have a great life?

If you are waiting for some conditions to be met before you can enjoy life, you are wasting perfectly good happy time. I’m going to keep this short this week because the dog is standing by me wagging her tail – we’re going to go jump in some puddles. My message is simple: Don’t wait to start enjoying your life. Don’t wait for the job or the bloke or the house or the bank account of your dreams. Start now. Right now. Enjoy it before it’s too damn late.

“Happiness cannot come from without. It must come from within. It is not what we see and touch or that which others do for us which makes us happy; it is that which we think and feel and do, first for the other fellow and then for ourselves.” Helen Keller

- Something To Play With -

Complete the following sentence “I will be happy when…” as many times as you can. Now throw that piece of paper away, get a new piece of paper and write in big red letters “I can and will be happy RIGHT NOW!” Then go do something that makes you happy. If you develop the ability to be happy even when life isn’t perfect, you will have a great life! Want to share how this article affects you?

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OnTheBeach – Strong Misery Muscles

How much time do you spend making life better? How much time do you spend appreciating how good you have it? How much time do you spend laughing, getting excited, being happy? Is it enough? Conversely, how much time do you spend making life worse? How much time do you spend bemoaning how bad you have it? How much time do you spend crying, getting stressed, being miserable? Is that enough?

Have you had enough of being dissatisfied with your lot? Do you want to see your life get better? Would you believe it’s your choice? Will I ever stop asking questions? Yes? I’m guessing that if you spend a lot of time on how terrible life is, you won’t have much time left for laughter, play, fun, joy, love, freedom, excitement, appreciation, gratitude, and wonder.

And that is your choice. I was chatting to a friend yesterday, and saying that I have stopped (largely) getting stressed out about money and such. How? By withdrawing my attention from worrying and stressing. It’s a choice. I made this choice because over the last 35 years, worrying has NEVER helped me to get more money or deal with a situation. Complaining has NEVER made a situation better. Fear NEVER helps me to find a creative solution.

I haven’t yet had to live on the street, so I’m doing ok! It’s all good. So, I’m putting my time and effort into being grateful, having fun, enjoying life. As is so often the case, this is a simple concept that isn’t always easy to put into practice. So to start with, it’s enough just to notice that you are choosing to spend more time in worry than in laughter (by the way, laughter costs nothing, whereas worry costs your health).

Pretty soon, you will make a new choice. And this gets easier and easier with practice. Our worry, stress, misery muscles are well developed and fed with the steroid of misery news, so it’s really easy to use them. But maybe your laughter, joy and fun muscles are flabby from lack of use?! The answer is simple: choose to tone them up. Make the effort to have some fun this week – trust me, life looks a lot better when you’re bouncing on a trampoline or standing on your hands. :p

- Something To Play With -

What ratio of time do you spend on misery:joy? Eg 90% misery, 10% joy. Are you ok with that ratio? Notice this week how many times you choose the dark side over the light. Want to share how this article affects you? E-mail meI love to hear from readers, and will respond to all e-mails. Or why not join Donna’s monthly group coaching to explore this concept some more?

- The Personal Bit -

When you read this, I will be covered from head to foot in chocolate and probably feeling very sick! I foolishly gave up chocolate for Lent – I was going to give up coffee, but as I don’t drink it, decided that was cheating! It hasn’t bothered me up until the last two weeks, and I am now drooling like Homer Simpson at the very thought. But Easter Sunday cometh…Hoorah! I have my Easter Eggs at the ready, steady…CHOCOLATE! Happy Easter!

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OnTheBeach – Everyone Is

- Everyone Is -

Do you ever feel slightly isolated, a bit weird, like you are the only person in the world who thinks the way you do? Me too! Do you ever feel like you are the only person in the world who struggles, has doubts, wonders if they are ‘getting it right’? Me too! Do you ever think that you are the only one who has a little self-doubting voice in your head? Wow, me too! In fact, I’d be willing to bet that the majority of people reading this have felt that way at one time or another. Everyone has doubts. Everyone has moments where they think they are the only people in the world who think or feel the way they do. And the great tragedy is that they are rarely right!

There is someone else out there who has felt, or thought exactly the same doubting, uncertainty, weirdness! A few years ago I was convinced that I was weird – and I didn’t consider it a good thing. This caused me many a moment of navel-gazing, upset and even depression. And then I met some people who were brave enough to say ‘hey! Me too!’. What an ‘aha’ moment for me – I realised that even the most confident people feel uncertain at times, even the most driven of people have moments of doubt, and even the most successful people feel like a failure. They just hid it well. For years, I genuinely could not accept myself because I thought I was mad – that no one else had the thoughts I had.

Realising that I was not alone was a turning point for me. If the people I respected and aspired to emulate had ‘weird’ thoughts, then so could I. If people I considered successful had moments of doubt, then so could I. And what’s more, if these people thought and felt this way and were still happy and successful, so could I be. Not only do we as a society hold up stick people as beautiful, we also hold up automatons as ‘normal’, and then we individually wonder why we have such ‘odd’ feelings and thoughts. It makes me want to scream. Here’s the thing – if you sometimes feel you’re a bit unusual, that’s normal! Normality is feeling and thinking and sometimes doubting.

I have come to terms with the fact that I am slightly odd, and I now consider it a very good thing that I think and feel the way I do – because that is just perfect for me. Who the hell wants to be an automaton?!

- Something To Play With –

If you knew that you are not a total oddball, that you are not “wierd”, that you are not alone in having the thoughts and feelings that you have, what would change for you? Want to share how this article affects you? Leave me a comment below.

- The Personal Bit –

This week I am repeating an article from way back in 2005; I hope you enjoy it. The reason I have been so lax and not created something new? Because this week ran away from me! Ever had that? When you think you have plenty of time to do everything, then before you know it its quarter to ten on Saturday night and you’re wondering what happened to the week? Other than the fact that I seem to have lost a couple of days somewhere, it’s been a good week. I learned how to play a nintendo wii, realised how rusty my pool skills are, and had an angel reading! Happy St Patrick’s Day to one and all. xx

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OnTheBeach – Hell Is Other People

An online community I am part of had a discussion subject this week about negative people – here’s my reply…

This subject made me smile – I used to avoid negative people because they brought me down. Now, I welcome them…because their negativity doesn’t mean anything to me. If someone is standing next to you wearing green, do you have to wear green? No! I know that is so easy to say once you’ve learnt to deal with them…and yes, sometimes a negative person will press on a bruise and ‘get me’…but that’s great too because they show me where I am not living in positivity!

Here’s how I’ve ‘dealt with’ them:
1. Avoid them (out of sight, out of mind!!! It’s a plaster rather than a fix)
2. Notice how they affect you and work out why – where do they show you where you are being negative? (The Work by Byron Katie is brilliant with this)
3. Remember that the world is a mirror FOR you – what are they bringing you that’s positive? Eg a chance to reinforce your positivity, a lesson on how not to do it, a reminder to protect yourself from negative energy
4. Remember the law of attraction – are you focusing on their negative aspects? Focus on the kind of person you want in your life, focus on the positive things about the ‘negative’ people in your life.
5. Learn to love, not fear a negative person. if it’s true that fear creates negativity, they’re just scared. Awwwww. Bless them. And yourself when you are scared and negative.
6. Enjoy watching them, because they show you how far you’ve come!!!
7. Never, ever try to convince them that positivity is good by words, do it by living that way. When I was negative and cynical, it drove me mad that people told me to be positive! But people who just did it, and didn’t join my pity party…wow, I still thank them for showing me the way!
8. Be compassionate with them and yourself. The more you learn, the less these people show up. Honest!

It’s interesting, when we start to be more positive ourselves, other people become less negative around us – once we get past the idea that the whole world has to be positive with us! Sometimes I still believe the Jean-Paul Sartre quote that ‘hell is other people’ , but most of the time I know that when other people are winding me up, it’s all about me, not them.

Something to play with
When negative people get you down this week, try some of the ideas above. Experiment and have fun with the idea that you can be surrounded by negative people, and still be a shiny, positive light! (If nothing else, it will irritate them immensely!) Want to share what’s going on for you? Leave me a comment below.

The Personal Bit
Wow! What a week. I have been right at the very edge of my learning curve this week. It’s been months since I last felt this saturated with information. It’s all good stuff, but I really feel in need of a rest! Feels like that earthquake here in the UK did more than just wake me up petrified in the middle of the night. It’s shaken all sorts of things loose.

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