The 3 Pillars: Rocket Fuel for Your Big Dream

The foundation of my coaching program is what I call the “3 Pillars” – self care, energy and joy. If you are cared for, full of energy and enjoying life, everything else is easier and falls more easily into place. Life flows more smoothly, creativity is easier to access, action is easier, inspiration flows through you. Everytime I have been struggling with life, either my self-care, energy or joy has been low. If I’m cared for, energised and enjoying life, bumps in the road don’t bother me as much.

Just in our normal lives, we need to be cared for, energised and enjoying life. When it comes to our Big Dreams, they demand even more from us – more energy, more time, more ‘stepping out of our comfort zone’, more growth, more connection, more life. (they also give a lot back, but that’s a different story) When you are following a Big Dream, that dream needs you to be in tip-top shape – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. If you’re not, it is harder to follow your path, and you will find yourself having to stop and refuel often.

Because I’ve had a virus in April, I had to practice Extreme Self-Care to get myself back to full fitness as quickly as possible (just going back to your normal routine as soon as you feel human again doesn’t work – I tried!). Extreme Self-Care simply means taking extremely good care of yourself – listening to your body and giving it what it needs; listening to your mind and giving it what it needs; listening to your heart and giving yourself the emotional care you need; listening to your soul and giving it what it needs to thrive. (For more about self-care, see my free ebook on the subject)

Energy is the second piece in the puzzle. Once you have your self-care sorted, you then need to energise yourself. Refuel, as it were. Without energy, how can you achieve your Big Dream? Without energy, how can you give your all to something that is outside your comfort zone? When you’ve got lots of energy (think Tigger!), you can bounce your way through and do everything you will need to do for your Big Dream. Many clients think this ’3 Pillars’ work is optional at first…until they notice the obvious link between lack of self-care, energy and joy and struggle in any area of life.

The last piece in the puzzle is JOY! Although it is the final piece, it is just as important as the other 2. And I have found over the years that clients will realise the importance of self-care and energy fairly quickly…but this joy piece takes more time to accept! Which does amuse me, because in my view, enjoying life is why we’re here! We’re having this life experience in order to experience the joys that can be found (even the joys in sorrow). Living a life filled with small joys is a beautiful experience. And for your Big Dream, it is Rocket Fuel! Imagine yourself as joyous – imagine how much you can get done in that energy of joy, imagine dancing through all the tasks you need to do to accomplish your Big Dream. Imagine being happy not because you’ve achieved your Dream, but just because you are enjoying life on the way to the next Big Dream…and the next!

The 3 together will make your life so much easier, and your Big Dream seem so much closer that you will wonder how you ever got anything done before! Once you have these strong foundations in place, you will find it easier to fly!

Your Homework

EVERY DAY ask yourself this:
How cared for am I feeling right now on a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘not at all’ and 10 is ‘cradled in the arms of love’. If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something to make yourself feel more cared for – do something that nourishes you.

If it is a 7 or more, ask yourself this:
How energetic am I feeling right now on a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘no energy’ and 10 is ‘I feel like Tigger, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy!’ If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something to raise your energy – do something fun, get out in nature, do something you love that raises your energy.

If it is a 7 or more, ask yourself this:
How much am I enjoying life right now a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘I’m not’ and 10 is ‘I am totally in love with my life’. If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something fun, something you enjoy – this is your life. ENJOY it!

When all 3 are a 7 or above, then you will naturally get moving on your big dreams because you feel good, you have mental clarity, you are enjoying life, you have energy. Make feeling good a habit, and see yourself get more productive and efficient (as well as happier, healthier, more energetic!).

To push this even further – when you regularly get to a 7 in all areas, try for an 8 every day, then a 9 when that gets ‘easy’, then a perfect 10 when 9′s are ‘easy’.

I would love to hear how you get on with this challenge – simply reply to this e-mail to tell me about your thoughts, your experience, your self-care, your energy and your joy!

This article was taken from May’s Dreams to Reality newsletter – to sign up, click here.

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Ask Donna: Multipassionate Entrepreneur

Q: My Big Dream is to have a business that embraces all my passions – art, making fabric bags, writing, feng shui…but everyone keeps telling me to pick one and focus on it. I don’t want to, and when I do, I feel like I’m cheating on my Big Dream. – Andrea

Be the authority in your life. For many people, focusing on 1 thing is great advice, because they can give their all to that one thing without getting distracted…but for some of us that are multi-passionate it’s not using the best of us. If you feel like you can give more by focusing on all things at once, do it!

Here’s the link to Marie Forleo http://www.marieforleo.com – a very successful multi-passionate entrepreneur. Check her out, she’s great!

Find your ‘North’ and ‘not North’ – when you are following your inner knowing, you are heading to your ‘North’. Here’s the link to the blog post I wrote about listening to Mind, Body, Heart and Soul.

And yes, I did use the word ‘conspire’ out of context! I meant conform! Oopsie.

If you have a question you’d like me to answer, please leave a comment below, go to the contact page, come over to facebook or find me on twitter.

Love

Donna.x

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May Daily Practice: Write

Over the past few years, I have re-discovered the joy of writing. Not just writing books, blog posts, courses (although that’s been fun!), but writing journals…diaries if you like. I wrote lots of diaries as a kid, I thought I was Adrian Mole. But then I got out of the habit of processing my thoughts and my life through writing…until a few years ago. Over the past 5 years, I have written more and more and more, in different types of journal, and rediscovered how powerful it is to write.

Last May I started a practice called ‘Morning Pages’. It is taken from Julia Cameron’s ‘The Artist’s Way’ and in its simplest form, it is 3 pages of longhand writing, about whatever pops into your mind – however petty, pointless and stupid (and sometimes profound, inspired and insightful). I have now been doing this practice every day for a year! Now, because I think the morning pages is a big commitment, I am not going to make the daily practice the Morning Pages (although I may do later in the year), but an easier practice to just WRITE every day. (Although if you want to join the practice of doing Morning Pages, go ahead!) I will be sharing a journalling prompt on my Facebook page every day to help you get started.

The March Daily Practice of Trusting Myself taught me how much wisdom I was holding inside…that I was completely oblivious of, because I wasn’t asking the right questions, and I wasn’t listening for the answers. This months’ practice will help you get even more in touch with the wisdom within – will you join me? Make it easy for yourself to join in – go and buy a notebook if you want to, but you can just write on the back of an envelope with a stubby pencil! And if you prefer, you can use technology to write. I like a pen and paper myself, but it’s your writing practice so do what works for you.

Today’s writing prompt: “I love…” Just finish that sentence, as many times as feels right for you. See where that prompt leads you today – you can write for a minute, 10 minutes, half an hour…whatever works for you. Start to become the authority in your own life with this writing practice! And please do come over to Facebook and share your insights, thoughts and feelings (and if you have any great writing prompts!)

Love

Donna.x

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Ask Donna: A New Dream is Calling

Q: I had a Big Dream I’ve been working towards for years…and now I have that Dream, I find another Big Dream is lurking under the surface. The trouble is that the new Big Dream is totally different and I will need to let go of a lot of the things I’ve worked so hard for. I feel so frustrated – I thought I’d be happy when I got this, but instead I’m now hankering after another challenge. What is wrong with me? – Sarah

Rather than be happy ‘when…’, work to be happy now – whatever your circumstances. Who you are, what you like, what you want changes as you age, and if you rely on any outside circumstance to be happy, when you change or the circumstance changes, that will affect your happiness. One way to do this is work on your self-care, energy and joy on a daily basis – when you’re cared for, energised and enjoying life (whatever the circumstance), the changes are easier to navigate.

When you change your dreams, you don’t lose everything – all the skills you have learned stay with you, the courage, the growth, the confidence stay with you. Your inner wisdom will tell you what you need to do now, and how to let go of the old and welcome in the new. To read more about this March daily practice, click this link http://www.donnaonthebeach.com/blog/2012/03/march-daily-practice-trust-yourself/.

To ask your question, simply comment below or use the contact page.

Love

Donna.x

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Daily Practice Wrap Up: Trusting Your Body, Mind, Heart and Soul

So, did you join in with the March Daily Practice of Trusting yourself and listening to your Body, Mind, Heart and Soul? If you did, what did you learn from this practice? What did you enjoy about it? What did you find challenging? If you didn’t join in, what stopped you? Take a moment to just process your experience of this Daily Practice.

I have LOVED this practice – I have realised that my Body, Mind, Heart and Soul ALWAYS know EXACTLY the right advice to give me to help me feel better physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, or to help me get moving. It has, genuinely been an AWESOME experience! I will DEFINITELY be keeping this one up in future months. I noticed that as I kept going, I got more information, more clearly and more easy. Practice makes perfect! So if you struggled with this practice, take the time to keep trying, keep listening – the body, mind, heart and soul are always talking…we just need to learn to hear what they’re saying.

I also wanted to share a few of the gems my body, mind, heart and soul have shared…

From my body:

“Listen to me…or I will make you listen.”

“Pay attention – that tension you feel is telling you something…!”

“Rest.”

“Enjoy the sunshine!”

“Shake it off, dance it off, let it go.”

From my mind:

“Focus attention on one thing at a time.”

“Your to-do list will still have un-done items when you’re dead! Chill out.”

“Take time to NOT think”

“Rest time (for both body and mind) is necessary for peak performance.”

“Focus on the present moment.”

“You’d enjoy life more if you followed the energy and stopped trying to force it!”

From my heart:

“Take care of yourself, treasure.”

“Love life freely, and without reservation.”

“I love…” (my heart spent a lot of time this month appreciating things I love!)

“Fall in love with your life just as it is…focus on what you love, fall in love with each moment”

“What is the most loving thing you can do for yourself right now?”

From my soul:

“Step into your Power.”

“Leave room for Magic.” (don’t over-schedule)

“In the infinity of the universe, all problems are miniscule, so don’t worry about a thing!”

“You cannot get it wrong, anything you decide is ‘right’.”

“Your desire for better is a hunger driving you forward. It can be fuel if you channel it into forward momentum instead of criticism.”

I would love to hear what wisdom your body, mind, heart and soul have shared this month. Please leave me a comment with your gems.

Love

Donna.x

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Podcast: Trusting Yourself and Your Big Dream

Trust in the wisdom you have within. And to really dive deep into this wisdom and inner guidance, we’re going to look at what our body is telling us every day, what our mind is telling us every day, what our heart is telling us every day, what our soul is telling us every day.

To listen to this week’s podcast, click here: Trusting Yourself and Your Big Dream

Homework:
Listen to what your body, mind, heart and soul have to say on a daily basis and what they have to say about your big dream. To get daily reminders and to share your wisdom, come and join us on facebook.

You can also subscribe to this podcast on itunes here.

May all your dreams become reality.

Love

Donna.x

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March Daily Practice: Trust Yourself

One of my ‘Beach Cards’ says: “If you really loved, accepted, honoured and believed in yourself, what would change?” One of the ladies on my facebook page said ‘everything’, which led me to decide that the Daily Practice for March will be ‘Trust Yourself’. When you trust yourself, you are loving, accepting, honouring and believing in yourself. So this month’s Daily Practice is to trust in you.

Trust in the wisdom you have within. And to really dive deep into this wisdom and inner guidance, we’re going to look at what our body is telling us every day, what our mind is telling us every day, what our heart is telling us every day, what our soul is telling us every day. For example, as I sit here and write this, my body is telling me I need to move – to dance or walk or do 10 minutes of yoga or stretch. Or maybe all four! My mind is telling me that it is clear and focused…but that my body isn’t!

My heart is telling me that this practice is going to change someone’s life. Ooh, juicy – could it be your life this practice changes? And my soul is telling me that following the ‘random’ inspirations that come up is the right way for me to live…and when those inspirations lose their energy, I’ve gone to far into my head and got to far ahead of myself so I need to come back to this moment and the next step and follow the thread of inspiration.

Beautiful, huh? And just what I need to know in each moment – and the same will hold true for you. Your body, mind, heart and soul are always giving you messages – but most of us don’t listen! We give away our power to someone else, making them the expert on our lives…and then wonder why we feel so disconnected, trapped and fed up! So this month’s mission, should you choose to accept it, is to notice every day, at least once a day what your body, mind, heart and soul have to say to you that day.

Are you going to join me in trusting yourself? Make sure you are a ‘likey’ of the facebook page to get the daily reminders, plus some more thoughts and quotes about trusting yourself. And I will be sharing what my body, mind, heart and soul have to say every day in March there too. Hope you will join me!

Love

Donna.x

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OnTheBeach – What Would Love Do Now?

This week’s article is inspired by the Beach Card of the week: “What would love do now? Remember that love is strong, not a doormat.”. I hope you enjoy it!

We’re on the last few days of our October Daily Practice. Did you laugh every day? There’s still time! I’ve thoroughly enjoyed this practice, and I’ve got another fun one lined up for November – I hope you’ll join me!

To get a daily Beach Card, and to get reminders of the Daily Practice (and this month, links to make you laugh, rubbish jokes and quotes about laughter!), come and join me on Facebook.

- What Would Love Do Now? -

Yesterday I had a mini-meltdown. I have one about once a month, if ya know what I’m sayin’?! And although it was so tempting to force myself to stay at my desk and keep my nose firmly to the grindstone, my higher self intervened and advised me to finish early (20 minutes early, but hey, early finish is early finish!) Today, having come down off the ceiling, I can see that my highest self suggested the most loving thing I could do for myself in that situation. It answered the question “What would love do now?” Love, funnily enough, would not keep me chained to my desk when I was upset and struggling, it would let me go take care of myself so I can come back raring to go this morning.

But how often do we do what love would do for us? The way most of us treat ourselves is more ‘what would our evil stepmom do to us now’ than ‘what would love do’. Don’t you think that’s a bit sad? We are all wonderful, divine sparks of uniqueness and brilliance (yes, even you) and yet we are treated most of the time like we are naughty children. In fairness, that’s the way most of us are brought up. You just get on with it…until you no longer can. You bottle it all up, until you explode like an angry bottle of champagne. You keep on pushing and pushing and pushing…because that’s what we do with our lazy, bad selves.

Ouch! The weird thing is that everyone I have ever coached, and indeed everyone I have ever known responds much better to love, support, encouragement, empowerment than to being pushed to the point of exhaustion, snide comments and mean-ness. How about you? Do you respond better to loving, nurturing and confidence-building? Have you ever tried to do that with yourself? And with others? Think of a situation you are in, either just yourself or involving another person. What would love do in that situation?

And let me be VERY clear here. Love is not a pushover. Love is strong. Love is gentle but very firm. Love does not lie down and allow people to walk all over her. In an abusive situation, the most loving thing to do for yourself is GET OUT, and the most loving thing you can do for the abuser is to GET OUT. It is not loving to anyone to stay in a situation where one person is being abused and another is abusing. Love would let the abuser know that abuse is not acceptable. Isn’t that the most loving thing to do? It’s like setting boundaries with dogs, kids, friends and family. If they know your boundaries, they don’t have to try to guess what is appropriate and what is not. When strong boundaries are set (an act of love for ourselves and those around us), we can respect them (another act of love).

So what would love do in your situation? What is the most loving thing you can do for yourself today? What is the most loving thing you can do for another person today? Remembering that love is strong, gentle and wise. May love light your path ahead today and every day, may you be cradled in the arms of love all your life and may love flow through your heart, expanding your capacity to give and receive love and filling you with joy.

- Something to Play With -

In every situation you find yourself in this week, ask ‘what would love do now?’ And let me know what love would do for you – leave a comment below.

Love

Donna.x

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Feel The Love

Do you have any idea how loved you are? Do you have any idea of the depth of love you are capable of? Most of us are not aware of either – we are constantly seeking love in entirely the wrong places! We expect other people to ‘make us feel loved’…but actually all other people do is open our heart to love – the love that is already within you.

And then when they go away, we close that door up again and believe that they took the love away with them. That would be like your schoolteacher taking away your intelligence when you left school. The love is already within you – no one can give it to you, and more importantly, no one can take it away from you. Other people can and do help us to open our hearts (as can animals, sunsets, music, poetry, literature, films) but to give them the power to close our hearts is to deny who we really are.

If you want to access the love, try this exercise. Close your eyes and take 3 deep breaths into your heart. Now feel the love you feel for yourself, now feel the love you feel for your family, your friends, your pets, now feel the love you feel for your neighbourhood. Now feel the love you feel for your country, now feel the love you feel for the world, now expand that love to encompass the whole universe (that’s the love you are capable of – wow!)

Now reverse the flow – feel the love the universe has for you, the world has for you, your country, your neighbourhood, your friends and family and pets have for you, the love that you have for you. This is how loved you are! If you really want to feel the love, do this EVERY DAY and feel how the love expands as you are opening up more and more to love. There is an ocean of love just waiting for you to tap into it.

Love (feel that?)

Donna.x

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Follow Your Heart

If you could be doing anything in the world right now, what would you love to do?

What makes your heart sing?

What do the stirrings of your heart whisper for you to do with your life?

Could you start to follow your heart right now?

You don’t have to do something huge and scary to follow your heart, you can just do something small, every day that follows the stirrings of your heart.

Before you know it, you have a happy life, a joyful life, the life your heart desired.

Start today.

Right now.

Love

Donna.x

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