The 3 Pillars: Rocket Fuel for Your Big Dream

The foundation of my coaching program is what I call the “3 Pillars” – self care, energy and joy. If you are cared for, full of energy and enjoying life, everything else is easier and falls more easily into place. Life flows more smoothly, creativity is easier to access, action is easier, inspiration flows through you. Everytime I have been struggling with life, either my self-care, energy or joy has been low. If I’m cared for, energised and enjoying life, bumps in the road don’t bother me as much.

Just in our normal lives, we need to be cared for, energised and enjoying life. When it comes to our Big Dreams, they demand even more from us – more energy, more time, more ‘stepping out of our comfort zone’, more growth, more connection, more life. (they also give a lot back, but that’s a different story) When you are following a Big Dream, that dream needs you to be in tip-top shape – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. If you’re not, it is harder to follow your path, and you will find yourself having to stop and refuel often.

Because I’ve had a virus in April, I had to practice Extreme Self-Care to get myself back to full fitness as quickly as possible (just going back to your normal routine as soon as you feel human again doesn’t work – I tried!). Extreme Self-Care simply means taking extremely good care of yourself – listening to your body and giving it what it needs; listening to your mind and giving it what it needs; listening to your heart and giving yourself the emotional care you need; listening to your soul and giving it what it needs to thrive. (For more about self-care, see my free ebook on the subject)

Energy is the second piece in the puzzle. Once you have your self-care sorted, you then need to energise yourself. Refuel, as it were. Without energy, how can you achieve your Big Dream? Without energy, how can you give your all to something that is outside your comfort zone? When you’ve got lots of energy (think Tigger!), you can bounce your way through and do everything you will need to do for your Big Dream. Many clients think this ’3 Pillars’ work is optional at first…until they notice the obvious link between lack of self-care, energy and joy and struggle in any area of life.

The last piece in the puzzle is JOY! Although it is the final piece, it is just as important as the other 2. And I have found over the years that clients will realise the importance of self-care and energy fairly quickly…but this joy piece takes more time to accept! Which does amuse me, because in my view, enjoying life is why we’re here! We’re having this life experience in order to experience the joys that can be found (even the joys in sorrow). Living a life filled with small joys is a beautiful experience. And for your Big Dream, it is Rocket Fuel! Imagine yourself as joyous – imagine how much you can get done in that energy of joy, imagine dancing through all the tasks you need to do to accomplish your Big Dream. Imagine being happy not because you’ve achieved your Dream, but just because you are enjoying life on the way to the next Big Dream…and the next!

The 3 together will make your life so much easier, and your Big Dream seem so much closer that you will wonder how you ever got anything done before! Once you have these strong foundations in place, you will find it easier to fly!

Your Homework

EVERY DAY ask yourself this:
How cared for am I feeling right now on a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘not at all’ and 10 is ‘cradled in the arms of love’. If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something to make yourself feel more cared for – do something that nourishes you.

If it is a 7 or more, ask yourself this:
How energetic am I feeling right now on a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘no energy’ and 10 is ‘I feel like Tigger, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy!’ If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something to raise your energy – do something fun, get out in nature, do something you love that raises your energy.

If it is a 7 or more, ask yourself this:
How much am I enjoying life right now a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘I’m not’ and 10 is ‘I am totally in love with my life’. If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something fun, something you enjoy – this is your life. ENJOY it!

When all 3 are a 7 or above, then you will naturally get moving on your big dreams because you feel good, you have mental clarity, you are enjoying life, you have energy. Make feeling good a habit, and see yourself get more productive and efficient (as well as happier, healthier, more energetic!).

To push this even further – when you regularly get to a 7 in all areas, try for an 8 every day, then a 9 when that gets ‘easy’, then a perfect 10 when 9′s are ‘easy’.

I would love to hear how you get on with this challenge – simply reply to this e-mail to tell me about your thoughts, your experience, your self-care, your energy and your joy!

This article was taken from May’s Dreams to Reality newsletter – to sign up, click here.

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Ask Donna: My SMART Goals Aren’t Inspiring Me

Q: I was trying to figure what I wanted from life, and I got some ‘SMART’ goals…but they don’t feel like a Big Dream. I think a couple of them are close to being part of that Big Dream, but the energy feels all wrong and I don’t know how to change them…and they’re really not that inspiring! – Mel

I find SMART goals really boring – they have no energy, no juice to them. So, let’s talk about SMILE goals instead (something I made up!) — does your goal make you Smile? Does it have a touch of Magic about it? Is it Inspiring to you? Do you have Lots of enthusiasm for this? Does it give you Energy?

For example, a SMART goal might be “Lose 10 pounds in 3 months”… whereas an example of a SMILE goal might be “Look stunning in a beautiful frock with gorgeous shoes”.

If you have a question you’d like me to answer, please leave a comment below or contact me.

Love

Donna.x

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Ask Donna: A New Dream is Calling

Q: I had a Big Dream I’ve been working towards for years…and now I have that Dream, I find another Big Dream is lurking under the surface. The trouble is that the new Big Dream is totally different and I will need to let go of a lot of the things I’ve worked so hard for. I feel so frustrated – I thought I’d be happy when I got this, but instead I’m now hankering after another challenge. What is wrong with me? – Sarah

Rather than be happy ‘when…’, work to be happy now – whatever your circumstances. Who you are, what you like, what you want changes as you age, and if you rely on any outside circumstance to be happy, when you change or the circumstance changes, that will affect your happiness. One way to do this is work on your self-care, energy and joy on a daily basis – when you’re cared for, energised and enjoying life (whatever the circumstance), the changes are easier to navigate.

When you change your dreams, you don’t lose everything – all the skills you have learned stay with you, the courage, the growth, the confidence stay with you. Your inner wisdom will tell you what you need to do now, and how to let go of the old and welcome in the new. To read more about this March daily practice, click this link http://www.donnaonthebeach.com/blog/2012/03/march-daily-practice-trust-yourself/.

To ask your question, simply comment below or use the contact page.

Love

Donna.x

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Every Moment is a Choice

How many choice points do you think you have in your life? Do you only see the “big” choice points – this job or that job, this relationship or a single life, buy a house or go to Australia. What would you think if I told you that this moment is a choice point?

And this one?

And this one?

And this moment right here?

What choices can you make in this moment?

Here’s a couple of ideas:

Do I do the most self-loving thing for myself now or not?

Do I look for the silver lining or not?

Do I do my best in this moment or do I just give in to apathy?

Do I choose to LIVE my life or do I wait for life to start?

Do I choose to raise my energy in this moment and do what I can to feel good or not?

Do I choose to smile or frown in this moment?

So what choices are you making? In every moment, you have the choice to change or not. There is no right or wrong in this by the way – no judgement, no blame. Just choice. So if you were to choose to do the most self-loving thing you could for yourself in this moment, what would happen? I understand that you may be at work and unable to have a long hot bath, but given the constraints you have, what would be the most self-loving thing to do?

How about if you chose to see the silver lining? What might change? Chose to do your best in this moment? Chose to LIVE? Chose to raise your energy? Chose to smile? (maybe even BEAM, chuckle, laugh, guffaw?!) You may choose to do the opposite of all of these – to see the worst, to do your worst, to exist apathetically, to lower your energy (we’re very good at that), to frown…but that’s your choice! So if that’s what you’ve chosen, I hope you’re enjoying it. (Once you get to a certain level of positivity, having a bad day can be fun too!)

What are you choosing in this moment? Let me know – leave a comment.

Love

Donna.x

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March Daily Practice: Trust Yourself

One of my ‘Beach Cards’ says: “If you really loved, accepted, honoured and believed in yourself, what would change?” One of the ladies on my facebook page said ‘everything’, which led me to decide that the Daily Practice for March will be ‘Trust Yourself’. When you trust yourself, you are loving, accepting, honouring and believing in yourself. So this month’s Daily Practice is to trust in you.

Trust in the wisdom you have within. And to really dive deep into this wisdom and inner guidance, we’re going to look at what our body is telling us every day, what our mind is telling us every day, what our heart is telling us every day, what our soul is telling us every day. For example, as I sit here and write this, my body is telling me I need to move – to dance or walk or do 10 minutes of yoga or stretch. Or maybe all four! My mind is telling me that it is clear and focused…but that my body isn’t!

My heart is telling me that this practice is going to change someone’s life. Ooh, juicy – could it be your life this practice changes? And my soul is telling me that following the ‘random’ inspirations that come up is the right way for me to live…and when those inspirations lose their energy, I’ve gone to far into my head and got to far ahead of myself so I need to come back to this moment and the next step and follow the thread of inspiration.

Beautiful, huh? And just what I need to know in each moment – and the same will hold true for you. Your body, mind, heart and soul are always giving you messages – but most of us don’t listen! We give away our power to someone else, making them the expert on our lives…and then wonder why we feel so disconnected, trapped and fed up! So this month’s mission, should you choose to accept it, is to notice every day, at least once a day what your body, mind, heart and soul have to say to you that day.

Are you going to join me in trusting yourself? Make sure you are a ‘likey’ of the facebook page to get the daily reminders, plus some more thoughts and quotes about trusting yourself. And I will be sharing what my body, mind, heart and soul have to say every day in March there too. Hope you will join me!

Love

Donna.x

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Ask Donna: Exhausted and Discouraged

Question: I am following my big dream and it’s been really hard work. I feel exhausted and discouraged, and worst of all I don’t feel I can talk about this as everyone keeps telling me to ‘be positive’ or give up. Maria

People who are not following their big dreams sometimes don’t understand those of us who are. Ask for the support you need from your friends – be really clear with them about how they can help you. Take a break from your big dream – when you are exhausted, the best thing you can do is relax and take a couple of days off from working on your big dream so you can replenish yourself and come back clear headed and chilled out.

Here’s the link to the podcast about the 3 Pillars: http://www.donnaonthebeach.com/blog/2012/01/dreams-to-reality-podcast-the-3-pillars/ – the 3 Pillars are self-care, energy and joy. If you’re not feeling cared for, you will feel exhausted and discouraged just because your self-care is low. If your energy is low, you have less to give your big dream. If you are not enjoying life…well, that sucks!

If you have a question, leave a comment below this post.

Love

Donna.x

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Dreams To Reality Podcast: The 3 Pillars

The 3 Pillars: Self Care, energy and joy. These 3 things are the foundation of a successful life – if you feel uncared for, depleted and you’re not enjoying life, life is so much harder! And if you want to make your big dream a reality, you need to be cared for, full of energy and enjoying your life.

To listen to this week’s podcast, click here: The 3 Pillars

Homework:
EVERY DAY ask your HEART this:
How cared for am I feeling right now on a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘not at all’ and 10 is ‘cradled in the arms of love’. If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something to make yourself feel more cared for – do something that nourishes you.
How energetic am I feeling right now on a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘no energy’ and 10 is ‘I feel like Tigger, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy!’ If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something to raise your energy – do something fun, get out in nature, do something you love that raises your energy.
How much am I enjoying life right now a scale of 1-10, where one is ‘I’m not’ and 10 is ‘I am totally in love with my life’. If it is less than a 7, your only task is to do something fun, something you enjoy – this is your life. ENJOY it!

You can also subscribe to this podcast on itunes here.

May all your dreams become reality.

Love

Donna.x

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OnTheBeach – Follow The Energy

When I am sending my weekly article to my list, I now decide what article to send you by picking a ‘Beach Card’ and expanding on that – either with a previous article or something new…and this week the card picked is spooky for 2 reasons – one, it’s exactly what I was doing yesterday – following the (lack of) energy straight to the bath – with a good book and bubbles up to my nose! And secondly because this article was first published a year ago. Maybe there’s something in the energy of this time of year?! Let me know if this article is particularly relevant to you right now.

- Follow the Energy -

I was on a group call last night with the fabulous Joel Young about NPA – a lovely method for freeing and allowing energy. Joel was talking about following the animation – the things that have energy. You know how your energy changes and goes down when you are, say, moaning about the weather? And how it changes and goes up when you are talking about something you love to do – like holidays, gigs, nights out with friends etc. Well that positive animation is what we’re talking about.

Joel likened it to surfing a wave – following that energy. When we are trying to ‘make’ ourselves do something…we are trying to surf on a millpond! That’s why sometimes it is so difficult to get something done…and on another day, you will fly through the same task. So where is the animation for you today? Where is the energy? What are you interested in and engaged by? Not what you ‘should’ be doing, but where the energy is building with a wave ready for you to surf.

If this is something you are not used to doing, it might sound a little hard…but it just takes a bit of practice. So start to notice – where is the animation? Where is the interest? What has a a wave of energy? Go do that – follow the energy and see where it takes you. I have found that following the energy makes life 1000 times easier. When I am trying to make the energy flow, life is harder, stuff takes longer, I am constantly getting stuck and it feels bad.

Take writing a blog post for example, if I try to write when there is no energy to write, I could sit at the laptop for a week without writing anything useful! But today, now, the energy is flowing…and this has taken 10 minutes so far. What a difference! Now there are times when you’ve just got to do it, and at those times, you can build the energy – for example, to get my accounts done, I put on some loud music and raise my energy so I can ‘get it done’.

But it’s becoming rare that I will try to force myself to go where the energy is not these days. And when I do, I remember it is a very inefficient way of living! As you start to follow the energy, you will notice that just by following what wants to be done, that naturally raises your energy for other tasks so you don’t have to artificially boost the energy. Tap into that energy of life that is all around you and just watch your life get easier as you ride that wave.

- Something to Play With -

Notice where the energy and animation is and follow it, notice how life gets easier when you ride the wave of energy (or if there is no energy, you rest!). Want to share your thoughts on this article? Please leave a comment below. Or pop over to my facebook page and leave a comment there.

- Beach Card of the week -

“Where is the energy leading you today? What wants to be done? Follow the energy – it feels good.”

Love

Donna.x

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What Door Do You Wish To Open?

It’s Wishcasting Wednesday. There is power in wishing – putting your wishes out there sets mighty forces into action…

What Door Do You Wish To Open?

I wish to open the door to greater success, greater abundance, greater service to others, greater joy, greater love, greater energy. I wish to open the door to more life. I wish to open the door to my dreams. I wish to open the door to the adventure and experience that is mine to live. I wish to open the door to all the good that life has to offer me.

Get involved on Jamie’s blog, or leave a comment here. As you wish for yourself, I wish for you also.

Love

Donna.x

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What Do I Wish for My Health?

Wishcasting Wednesday is here again.

What Do I Wish for My Health?

Ah, such an easy one to answer – I wish to be vibrantly, radiantly healthy in every way. I wish for my health to be a higher priority in my life than my to do list. I wish to let go of all those things that no longer serve me. I wish for vibrant, radiant health in all areas of my life – healthy work, healthy relationships, healthy body, mind, heart and spirit. I wish for my health to be as good as it can be.

Get involved on Jamie’s blog, or leave a comment here. As you wish for yourself, I wish for you also.

Love

Donna.x

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