Completing the Circle

Did you know that your dreams, your goals and your gifts have chosen you, just as you have chosen them? Yes – the reason you have those dreams, goals and gifts is because they looked at you and said “Wow, this person is the PERFECT person for me!” The universe doesn’t get this wrong. Even if you do not have total confidence in yourself, your dreams, goals and gifts do. If they didn’t, they’d go find someone else.

So complete the circle – know that you are chosen, just as you chose. And as you and your dreams, goals and gifts are a team, if you need help – you know exactly who to go to first!

Love

Donna.x

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Why Should You Be Able to Do Something You’ve Never Done Before?

It’s interesting to me how often I have conversations with people that go along these lines – “oh I could never do that thing you do, I’m rubbish at (whatever it is) and you’re so good” to which I invariably reply “Well, I couldn’t do it either when I first started”. Competence in anything – whether it’s writing, making video, speaking in public, driving, operating a piece of technological wizardry – is often more a measure of how much practice someone has had than how brilliant they are.

Of course there are people who are natural geniuses, and are born able to walk, talk, ride a bike, program a video (hehehe)…oh no, there aren’t. Everyone has to learn how to do everything. I will allow that some people do have an affinity for a particular area which makes it easier for them to pick it up – some of us find writing easy, some find driving easy, some find cooking easy, some find running easy, some find predictive text easy…and the list goes on ad infinitum.
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OnTheBeach – I am Where I Am And Where I Am Needs No Excuses

My apologies for both stealing and changing the words of a well known cheesy choon. It’s usually ‘I am what I am’ but today I want to talk about where you am. Where you are in your life specifically. I suspect that wherever you are, you’d quite like to be somewhere else – relationship wise, career wise, even geographically. That’s natural, it’s normal because part of what makes us human is our desire to grow, evolve and change.

Trouble is that because you’d quite like to be somewhere else, where you are now gets a bad rap. We often think that life will be better when we’re richer, thinner, live somewhere else, have more stuff or more power…but often all that changes is that we get a bit richer, thinner, live somewhere else, have more stuff or more power. Somehow life doesn’t get better. So when we are unhappy, we believe that where we are is to blame in some way.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am not advocating staying put in a rubbish situation. But I do advocate being at peace with where you are, even enjoying where you are to whatever extent you can. Why? Well, first of all you are where you are in life…and you’ll likely be there for the next few minutes at least – maybe even the next few days, weeks or months. So why not find a way to let it be ok to be where you are? You’ve got to be there anyway! Resisting reality is a sign of insanity – it drives you crazy! That resistance is a BIG part of why you feel so bad. Stop fighting the reality of where you are right now.

Secondly, where you are is part of your journey – if you are not totally loving where you are right now, it is helping you to get more clarity about where you’d like to be. This is a VERY GOOD THING! Most of us look at this contrast between what we want and what we have and get depressed, but actually if you didn’t have ‘this’ how would you know you want ‘that’? For example, every rubbish relationship you ever had brings you to a closer understanding of what you really want in a partner, and this experience helps you sort the wheat from the chaff.

Thirdly, contrary to popular belief, bemoaning, criticizing and denouncing where we are does not help us to move on. It actually undermines our confidence, keeps us stuck and makes the situation even worse! Years ago I was in a job I hated and I wanted to leave for 3 years…but when I came to terms with the fact that for now, I was there and I needed to start making the best of it, I decided to leave. Within a month! If you’re feeling ok with where you are, you’re in a great position to move with ease to the next phase of your life – and worse case scenario, you are where you are and that’s ok!

- Something To Play With -

Think about a situation in your life that you’d like to change. Now find 5 things about that situation that are actually good. Now find 5 more. Keep doing this for a few weeks and notice how your resistance lowers and your confidence rises. Want to share your thoughts on this article? Leave me a comment below. xx

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Now That’s What I Call Bloody Minded!

So, you’re playing tennis, you’re 2 sets down and in the 3rd set your opponent is serving for the match. What do you do?

Well, if you follow tennis in Britain, you’ll probably know that Andy Murray went on to WIN the match! Stunning. Un-believable. I was sat in watching the tv last night with a look of utter incredulity on my face. I am still shocked. From being totally out of the game, he went on to win it! Many people (me included) would have been thinking about supper at that point and given up. Mind you, I’m rubbish at tennis, so there would have been NO chance of a comeback for me!

Anyway, it got me thinking…when you are going for your goals and dreams in life, do you keep going til the last point, or do you give up half way? Now I’m not necessarily recommending sheer bloody-mindedness necessarily – it’s hard work for a start! But what if you just kept playing for the things you wanted? All too often, people give up when things are just starting to happen! Sometimes you have to change the playing field, I know that, but you don’t have to give up on your dreams.

In fact, I’d go as far as to say, you mustn’t give up! Because you can do it…with a healthy dollup of self-belief, a bit of luck and tenacity – you will do it. And observers will be standing round opened mouthed, saying ‘unbelievable’, ‘stunning’ and ‘bloody hell, good for you!’

Love

Donna.x

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I DID IT!!

Last night at Toastmasters I did my 10th advanced level speech and I got my ‘Advanced Communicator – Bronze’ Award. Yay me! Woo hoooooo!!

The purpose of this post is threefold:
1 – to big up myself
2 – to encourage you to big up yourself – seriously, it’s not arrogant to talk yourself up, it is only right to allow yourself to be proud of you and tell the world. Yay me!!! Ahem.
And 3 – if you would like to gain more confidence and learn to speak confidently in front of a roomful of people – check out toastmasters. Right now. I joined a little over 3 years ago and I have got so much more than I ever expected from my membership.

And just in case you didn’t realise, I am SO proud of myself!!

Love

Donna.x

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Enough About Me, What Do You Think of Me?

I had a beautiful message yesterday, from someone I sent my (soon to be ready for public consumption!) free ebook to. She basically said she thought I was amazing, filled me with confidence and joy that something I wrote had such an impact. And her encouragement had a wonderful impact on me. I am keeping that message, and I am going to watch it often.

Putting myself down and telling myself I am rubbish comes easily, but building myself up in the way this message did is a little harder – especially if I’m having a bad day! I wonder if you realise the impact of a compliment on someone else? Here, let’s try this one – I can see that you are an intelligent person with impeccable taste, because you are reading my blog!

Feel good? Seriously, compliments can change the course of a person’s life. Next time you feel that someone is wonderful, say it. I promise that the good stuff will come back to you tenfold!

Love

Donna.x

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