Equality

This weekend I had a rush of nostalgia and got out some very old albums from the 80′s. When I was listening to Howard Jones ‘Equality’, the lyrics held a certain poignancy they didn’t have when I was nine and three quarters. Here they are for you:

Everybody wants to feel happy, even if you think that you don’t
Everyone wants to know the secret, even if you think that you don’t
Everybody thinks they’re different from the next man now
But we just got to realize we’re just the same

Always appear to be someone better
You know there will always appear to be someone worse
You know there’ll always appear to be someone better
You know there’ll always appear to be someone worse, oh

Everyone has got their character
Everyone has got their personality
But the longing is still the same
So what is the answer be easy on yourself
Make yourself feel at ease maybe that’s the answer

Always appear to be someone better
You know there will always appear to be someone worse
Always appear to be someone better
You know there’ll always appear to be someone worse, oh

We’re just the same don’t you know
We’re just the same don’t you know
Looking over there
He looks different, she looks different
They might even be different
But we’re just the same, don’t you know
We’re just the same, don’t you know
We’re just the same

We are all the same. We all have the same challenges and joys, we are all striving for happiness, we are all extremely hard on ourselves. And what is the answer? BE EASY ON YOURSELF. Make yourself feel at ease. Maybe that’s the answer. Yup, I think that might well be the answer. Imagine if you were easy on yourself, made yourself feel at ease, relaxed into life and allowed yourself to enjoy it. Not in competition with anyone, not judging yourself to be worse than someone else. Just you, being easy, living.

Try it. Give yourself the gift of understanding that we’re all the same – no matter how different we look on the outside. And give yourself the gift of being easy on you – you may feel that you need to give yourself a hard time to ‘get shit done’, but all this actually does is undermine you and make you feel bad about yourself. Being easy on yourself will make you feel GOOD about you. Build yourself up, don’t tear yourself down. And there will always appear to be someone better…but they’re just the same!

Love

Donna.x

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Having a Bad Day?

Ever have a bad day? Next door’s dog wakes you up for the 84th morning in a row barking his head off at a mouse farting 3 miles away, you slip in the shower, all the lights are red, it’s bloody raining, nothing you are expecting has arrived, you feel as creative as a paving slab, and some idiot is trying to cheer you up.

Sadly for me, that ‘some idiot’ is me! A couple of weeks ago, I was having a bad day. I tried music (didn’t drown out the feckin dog!), yoga (couldn’t be bothered to do more than 2 sun salutes), dancing (not in the mood), getting out of the house (it was bloody raining), shifting myself up the emotional scale (worked for about 5 minutes), looking at my life vision (worked for about 5 minutes), tidying up (do I look like I’m in the mood for fecking housework?), gratitude (yeah, yeah), accepting that I’m in a bad mood and not trying to change it for a while, and watching Blackadder episodes.

Blackadder did work up until I got back to my desk. So lastly, I tried writing about it. And FINALLY, something that works! It largely worked because I was so amused at my grim determination to be in a bad mood and therefore have a bad day! I know that this is my choice, so it begs the question ‘why the f… would I choose to be grumpy?’. After some ‘I don’t bloody know’ type answers, I discover my bad mood was trying to do me a favour.

On the basis that every part of every body has a positive intention, my bad mood was doing its absolute best to get me to chill out and DO WHAT I WANT TO DO. I really didn’t want to be sat at my desk that day, but because I was out with friends later and I had a ‘to do’ list, I felt like I ‘had to’. Nonsense. It would have been good if I had, but the world didn’t end.

And here’s the other element – I hadn’t been sleeping for days, my throat was sore, my head was banging, I was feeling really uncared for. It was a terrible shame for me. The solution? I gave myself a break – did what I have to do that afternoon (2 things), then chilled out for an hour before I went out. Having just made the decision to do that, my bad mood lifted and went away…job well done.

- Something to Play With -

How do you cheer you up? In this article are 11 ideas that I use (and I have another 40 or so!). Make a list of things that make you feel better. And then, when the bad mood hits, remember to ask the question ‘why?’. Maybe that part of you that wants to be in a bad mood has a positive intention for you? Want to share your thoughts on this article? Leave a comment below.

Love

Donna.x

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What Do I Wish To Enjoy?

It’s Wishcasting Wednesday with Jamie Ridler. There is power in wishing – putting your wishes out there sets mighty forces into action…

What Do I Wish To Enjoy?

EVERYTHING! The very simple answer to this question is that I wish to enjoy everything in life! Work, relationships, food, sunshine, rain, exercise, sleep, friends, social life, money, everything. I wish to enjoy every moment of every day!

It reminds me of a quote from Agatha Christie: “I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow; but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.”
To be alive is a truly grand thing, and I wish to enjoy all of this life!

Get involved on Jamie’s blog, or leave a comment here. As you wish for yourself, I wish for you also.

Love

Donna.x

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Do You Know How Beautiful You Are?

For the last week, I have been doing the chopra centre 21-day meditation challenge. In yesterday’s meditation, this poem was referenced.

Saints Bowing in the Mountains

Do you know how beautiful you are?
I think not, my dear.

For as you talk of God,
I see great parades with wildly colorful bands
Streaming from your mind and heart,
Carrying wonderful and secret messages
To every corner of this world.

I see saints bowing in the mountains
Hundreds of miles away
To the wonder of sounds
That break into light
From your most common words.

Speak to me of your mother,
Your cousins and your friends.
Tell me of squirrels and birds you know.
Awaken your legion of nightingales—
Let them soar wild and free in the sky.
And begin to sing to God.

Let’s all begin to sing to God!

Do you know how beautiful you are?
I think not, my dear,
Yet Hafiz
Could set you upon a Stage
And worship you forever!

-Hafiz

Do you know how beautiful you are?

Love

Donna.x

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You Are A Catalyst

Imagine this – you are a person who affects hundreds of people every day. Your thoughts and ideas are highly sought after. You are looked up to by people around you. You are a catalyst for other people – you may be a muse for someone, a launch pad, a sounding board, the wing beneath someone’s wings. Sound good? Sound true?

It should, because it is – every single day YOU have the capacity to affect the lives of many others – people you work with, live with, travel alongside, interact with in shops and bars, phone, e-mail, text, friends, family, acquaintances, strangers. Don’t believe me? Have you ever had this experience – you are having a rough day, you are fed up, scared, tired, worried – and a complete stranger does you a kindness. And suddenly the world doesn’t seem so bad after all.

That kindness could be letting you out in traffic, beaming at you for no apparent reason, being polite (surprisingly effective), cracking a joke, doing something very random (kids waving at me from the back seat of a car always entertains me on the motorway). You may never see this person again, but they may have had a profound impact on your life, or just brightened your day.

You have the potential to have that profound impact on someone today. And every day. We do not live in an isolated society (even though it feels like it sometimes!) – we are all affected by those around us. And my question is, are you using your impact in the way you want to? Or are you careless with your words and actions, completely oblivious to how you are impacting someone else’s day?

Not just with strangers, with everyone – your family, friends and colleagues – do you have a positive impact on them? Do you encourage them to shine? What’s in it for you? It feels great to do something good for someone else – to encourage, to nurture, to be kind and loving. There is no feeling quite like knowing that you have positively affected someone else’s life AND you attract the same back.

- Something to Play With -

This week, make an effort to encourage others – be interested in your loved ones dreams, be optimistic about new ideas, and best of all, live your life to the full and inspire those around you. Want to share your thoughts on this article? Leave a comment below.

- Beach Card of the week -

Well, it’s just the perfect card to go with this article!! “Help someone else – give them something – a smile, a gift, a blessing, your love.” Ain’t that spooky?

If you like the ‘Beach Card’, come and join me on Facebook where I share a daily Beach Card.

Love

Donna.x

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Choose to be Happy Anyway

Here’s a choice for you:

You have a flat tyre.

You can either be pissed off and have a flat tyre, or you can be happy and have a flat tyre.

Either way, you still have a flat tyre.

Which will you choose? If you decide to choose to be pissed off, what will you do? For example, you could complain about it, tell yourself how blasted inconvenient it is in every way, pout, cry, you could even stamp your feet.

How about if you decide to be happy? What will you do then? for example, you could look for the funny side, you could smile (or even beam), you could take the opportunity to show your skills at changing tyres, you could call a good friend to help and spend time with them laughing, you could flirt with the guy at the garage, you could experience the kindness of strangers.

Either way, you still had a flat tyre, but one is more fun, more enjoyable, and allows you to be cheerful.

By the way, this applies to other things than flat tyres.

Love

Donna.x

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Go to the Cricket? Why Would I Want to Do That?

As you’re reading this, I am at Edgbaston for the cricket. I am hoping that I will be bathed in endless sunshine, cheerfully watching a day of exciting cricket…and that British Summer Time will once again remember that it is July, not November or monsoon season. I was ever an optimist!

10 years ago I had less interest in cricket than I had in the native flaura and fauna of Siberia…that is to say, none! But my dad had a spare ticket and I had a spare day…and, well, it was great! Of course back then it involved large quantities of beer, but even in my more sober days, it is a great day out. Weather permitting, it is relaxing, play permitting, there is a party atmosphere, and aside from my frequent questions (what’s he doing over there, what happened there, and what the chuff is a googly) it is a most pleasant day out.

I tell you this not to encourage you to go to a cricket match, but to encourage you to try something new. When was the last time you did something you’ve never tried before? Went somewhere you’ve never been before? Seen a sport you’ve never seen before? You never know, you may find yourself still going 10 years later, and still enjoying it!

Love

Donna.x
PS Pray for sunshine!

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Remember You’re A Womble

Do you remember the Wombles? The wombles of wimbledon common would go around the common picking up litter, recycling and clearing up the place. They were one of my favourite kids tv shows in the 70′s. Today, the #riotwombles have taken over twitter which has amused me a lot.

This picture probably won’t make the national or international news, unlike the pictures of parts of London burning, but I personally would much prefer to see THIS news. The news that regular, ordinary people turn out to clear up and help restore the mess left by the brainless. In Birmingham too, people have turned out to help clear up, to show the REAL face of this country.

A few people have said on twitter and facebook that they are ashamed to be British having seen the rioters on the news. But look at this forest of brushes and be PROUD! THIS is the real face of Britain, people who will muck in to help out, people who in a crisis will turn up with a broom and sweep up. My favourite tweet of the day was “Would it be outrageously British to follow the rioters with brooms and just sort of tidy up on the go? #hands2gether #riotwombles” @photosonny. That’s what’s British – pulling together, helping each other and having a sense of humour about it. And I’m pretty proud of that. And enormously entertained that they’ve been christened ‘riotwombles’.

So, simply for your amusement, here are the Wombles at Glastonbury 2011. Remember you’re a womble – someone who is helpful, nice, cares about the environment and the community…and has a good line in laughter and music!

Love

Donna.x

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What Door Do You Wish To Open?

It’s Wishcasting Wednesday. There is power in wishing – putting your wishes out there sets mighty forces into action…

What Door Do You Wish To Open?

I wish to open the door to greater success, greater abundance, greater service to others, greater joy, greater love, greater energy. I wish to open the door to more life. I wish to open the door to my dreams. I wish to open the door to the adventure and experience that is mine to live. I wish to open the door to all the good that life has to offer me.

Get involved on Jamie’s blog, or leave a comment here. As you wish for yourself, I wish for you also.

Love

Donna.x

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Champagne Moments

Over the last few days, I have been watching/listening to the cricket test match between England and India (and getting very excited about going to the test match in Birmingham next week!). One of the things the commentary team do is to nominate ‘champagne moments’ of the match – special moments which warrant a cork pop and a raised glass. I love this idea, and I think we should all do this all day every day – nominate champagne moments throughout the day.

Joy lives in small moments, that we often miss in the hustle and bustle of our lives. And our achievements also get lost in the day to day of living. We tend to only notice the ‘big joys’ and the ‘big achievements’, and as they only come along a few times a year, we rarely feel we have anything to celebrate. But that’s such a shame, because most days there is something to celebrate – a project that has progress made on it, a pound lost, a phone call to a friend, a canny purchase of fabulous shoes, a hug with your partner or kids, sunshine, the dog obeying a command, the partner or kids doing the washing up…

…all the small things that make up a life of small joys. So instead of missing them all, and feeling like there is very little in life to celebrate, why not start a practice of nominating champagne moments every day? You don’t have to drink champers every day, the practice is to celebrate, not become a boozer! You could raise your evening cup of tea to the ‘champagne moment’ of the day. Every day, notice all the small things you enjoy, all the small things you achieve, all the moments of happiness and joy that would normally pass you by and designate each one a ‘champagne moment’.

My champagne moment nominations so far today are: sitting in the sunshine doing my morning pages, a great session with a client this morning, a bird flying into the window and being ok, attaching ribbon to the window so birds won’t fly into it anymore (love it when I achieve something practical), my cricket tickets for next week arriving (YAY! So far this is the winning moment for me!), writing a lovely blog post. Woohoo – 6 potential champagne moments already and it’s not evening 3 in the afternoon yet! What are your ‘champagne moment’ nominations for today?

Love

Donna.x
Photo by Nino Andonis

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